[00:00:00] Red leather, yellow leather. Shit. Do you want me to play the theme? Want to get hyped? Want to get hyped? Oh shit, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Go ahead. Hey, I'm Jerry. Hey, I'm Aaron. And this is Retro Rehab.

[00:00:32] Welcome back to Retro Rehab, the greatest collaboration of all time. Today, we will be doing our first in our series of Retrospected and Rehabbed, where we reflect on the console, the memories we have with it, talking about some fun facts you might not know. And finally, we'll break down and spotlight our fave features and games, baby. Also, as of right now, at the time of this recording, it's Aaron's birthday, baby. It is. I'm 33.

[00:01:01] The birthday boy, huh? But a babe, sweet summer child. Fresh babe, hot out the womb. Which, I mean, I'm only three years older than you. So it's not... We ain't babies no more. That's why we're talking about retro consoles. That's right. That's right. Yeah. But before we get into that, what the hell could possibly be new in the world of retro, you're thinking? First off, rank... Oh, fuck.

[00:01:32] I almost said rank translation. ROM translation. Fist of the North Star 2 for the NES. That's pretty fucking cool. I didn't know they had a fist of the North Star for NES. Yep. I was perusing ROM hacking today. And, yeah, I've seen that... This translation actually came out last month, but it kind of slipped through the cracks. But apparently, it's more than just a translation. They...

[00:02:00] From what I'm reading here, the original game was kind of bad. So there's been a massive overhaul in rebalancing a lot of, I guess, what made the game bad. Which is kind of cool. I've never... It's funny. I've never actually, like... I've never played a fist of the North Star game. And I've never seen the anime or anything. Which is crazy because as somebody who loves Berserk, I know that Miura has said a few times that... Even just Guts' design is based upon the main character of that. Who...

[00:02:30] I don't know what his name is. Kenshiro. I forget his whole name. It's like Kenshiro something. We looked it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kenshiro... That's what's... I don't know. Keep going. Keep talking. I don't know. But yeah. So check that out. That's... That translation slash ROM hack is by Arnani Costa. And it is over on ROMhacking.net. Looks like a beat-em-up game. Looks pretty cool. And, you know...

[00:02:59] Yeah. If they rebalance some things and fix some stuff up, I'm always down for trying to beat them up, man. Beat-em-ups are good. And then other than that, there was recently a brand new translation for Earthlight, which is a Hudson game for the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. Whoa, what the fuck? This looks... Yeah. Cool, I think.

[00:03:24] So, from what I can gather from what I'm seeing on this page here... It looks... It looks... Like, I think it's like some sort of a strategy game or something. Like... Yeah. Or like... I don't know. I kind of want to dig in more to this. I wish I had watched a video, maybe. Sometimes I try to... You know...

[00:03:52] Not to look at videos of stuff like this, because I like to just like throw something on and see it for the first time without really knowing what it is. But I think it is like some kind of a real-time strategy game that's made by Hudson. And it clearly looks like it's made by Hudson. Like, this looks like it could be like Bomberman strategy. The cover of the game says that it's anime... It's anime. Anime Space War game. Also, look in the photo I just sent you in the chat.

[00:04:21] That's the coolest man on the planet. That was awesome. I will attempt to describe what I'm seeing on the screen. I see a man with what appears to be one large golden earring, spiked shoulder pads, and a just absolutely astonishing... Would you call that a pompadour haircut? I think so. Or a flat top. Yeah, flat top.

[00:04:50] That's what I was looking for. And it's blood red. So you know my man's not fucking around. No fucking around. None of that shit. But yeah, that ROM translation. Earthlight. Go check it out. It's on romhacking.net. And it is by Nez. Nez. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now we're getting to the retrospective and rehabbed. Today we're talking about the NES. The OG Nintendo home console. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:05:20] Home console. I feel like this is like the right place to start for the first in this kind of series. Cause like... It's probably the first console that I ever played. Yeah. Like... I know I've played an Atari 2600 at some point. But... Same. Yeah. When I was really fucking young. And I don't remember a whole lot other than like Joust. Uh... Cause I... As a kid I was like... Ostriches? What? Man.

[00:05:50] Were they ostriches? Yeah. You're riding on ostriches. Man. That's not... I did not know. I did not have... I did not have... Or Pitfall 2. Oh yeah. Pitfall was cool. Yeah. Um... But yeah. Like I... I'm pretty sure at some point I did play an Atari. I think like... I don't know. My mom was like, Oh, check out this old piece of shit that I found in the attic. And then like hooked it up. And I was like, Well, this doesn't look anything like what my friend has over at his house.

[00:06:19] This isn't a fucking PS1 bomb. Get the fuck out of here. You're ruining my life. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. But um... But yeah. The uh... The NES. The Nintendo Entertainment System. Uh... I guess I'll... I'll share a little bit of uh... Just a brief little history about the old NES here. Okay. Okay.

[00:06:39] Some people might not have known that it was actually first released to a test market only in New York City over here. Um... In 1985. In October. Uh... And then the following year in 1986. Uh... Not too... It wasn't like a full year or anything, but in February they uh... They did another one of those like kind of launches in Los Angeles.

[00:07:08] And I think like this kind of will... Will play into something else that we'll talk about. About some like fun facts about the system. Um... Kind of what they were testing. I think. Um... But the American world... Like the... The American release was on September 27th, 1986. It's funny because I always thought that it was an 85 console. For some reason. I guess it technically was. But uh... 86 is when everybody started buying these bad boys.

[00:07:38] And um... It was the NES, the Nintendo Entertainment System to us. Here in North America. And the Famicom, which stood for Family Computer. Uh... Over in Japan. And... In... Korea. It was called the... Hyundai Comboy. Nice dude. I... I hope it had the like the Hyundai symbol. Back in the day. The Hyundai Comboy. I think that's what they uh... I'm pretty sure that's how they modeled the Elantra.

[00:08:08] Was after the uh... After the Nintendo Entertainment System. Man, it's so... Get yourself an Elantra with a... Comboy inside of it. It's so weird how like how different the Famicom looks compared to the NES. It's such a fucking... Weird comparison, man. It is. It's cool too because like if you look at the Famicom. The controllers. The wire for the controllers.

[00:08:38] Was attached to the console. They weren't like they were over here. Like you couldn't detach them. And... They were really short cables. And I think... Part of that is because like... You know, over here in North America. Um... A typical American living room. Would have like a TV. Or like some sort of a TV console. Like the TV would be up on something. But I think part of the reason for the... For the Famicom having such short things is because...

[00:09:06] People typically sit on the floor. And like close to the... To the TV. So like that's why... Like I'm not a... I'm like 90% sure that's what it is. I feel like I read that a while ago. I didn't read that today when I was reading some of these articles. But... I'm pretty sure that's... That was the justification behind why they had such tiny little cables. That makes sense. It's almost like... It's almost like Nintendo tried to pull a fast one on us when they released the classic consoles.

[00:09:36] What were they thinking with those? With those... Like... The fucking... The wingspan of a Nest Mini's cable was like... Not even as long as my arm. Like they're so short. And like... I don't know dude. I don't get what they were trying to do with that. Like pretty much everybody that I know that has one of those consoles either A. Does not play it. Or B.

[00:10:06] Or B. Has like the extension things. Man and the fucking... The Famicom cartridges were so colorful. Compared to like the... The gray or black or like gold NES cartridges. Because like Famicom you had some that were like... Bright orange. Bright green. Yeah blue. Bright blue. Like pink sometimes. You had some pink ones. They look... Yeah. Really really... And like the... The art on the cartridges looks... Oh man. Really really cool too.

[00:10:35] Like way cooler than the... Some of the American art. Not very often do we get cooler American art on our consoles here. Um... It's usually always bangers. Over in Japan. I love some of the uh... The original Dragon Quest art. That's on some of the cartridges. Even Popeye. So good. Even Popeye. Even Popeye. It looks really really cool. Um... Yeah man. They've got a speed with that.

[00:11:04] But uh... Yeah. That's uh... And it sold uh... It sold over 60 million units. That's... That explains why I have three in my house I guess. You have three of the 60 million. Yeah dude. I'm hoarding these bitches. I'm gonna own every NES in the world. Um... So... I guess uh... To kind of clarify what kind of uh... Series this is gonna be. With these uh...

[00:11:33] Retrospected and rehabbed. Uh... We'll be you know of course doing a retrospect of... Of these consoles and then... The rehabbed section is basically... How... How... How do you play these today? Like what's the... What's the best way to play these? And like how... How can you play them? What's the best way to... To go about doing this for... You know whatever situation you have. Not everybody can have... The same situation as some of us. But uh... There's... There's more than enough ways that you can get your hands on playing some... Some... Regular Nintendo. Regular...

[00:12:03] Yeah... Yeah as everybody calls it... Regular Nintendo. Nintendo. Yep. I uh... The R NES. I know... I'm fairly certain the original Nintendo console itself is still fairly cheap. Um... Cause yeah... There's just shit tons out there. Everybody... You could go to like... You could go down the street to any garage sale and find an NES. I'm fairly certain. Yeah they're still... Pretty cheap as far as I know. Yeah you can get them for like 50 bucks.

[00:12:33] Pretty much. Anywhere. eBay on... Like... And on marketplace and stuff. Like people are always selling those things. The only problem is... And uh... Which you know... Brings us to... This... This portion is... Ways to play. So... Original hardware obviously is the... The starting point. Um... This would be for collectors. I would say mostly. Uh... Collectors and enthusiasts that wanna... That wanna have like the physical thing. The only caveat to that is... You know... This is very old hardware.

[00:13:03] Yeah. Unless it was like kept up well. You run the risk of certain things being... You know... Damaged or... The longevity of the console itself is... Maybe a little at risk. But... I... I kind of... So... I mean... I... Eventually want to have like... A cabinet... Dedicated to Nintendo consoles. Where I have like... Basically like the lineage... Of all the consoles. I don't want them hooked up. I just want them on display. Yeah. Because I... I love... I love all of them individually. Like...

[00:13:33] Individual kids. There's no... There's no bastard sung among those... Those consoles. None of them have red hair. And I can say that because I have red hair. Calm down. I know what it's like to be a red headed kid. Okay? Um... And picked on. This is now a therapy session. No, I'm just kidding. Um... So yeah. Original hardware. Um... Aaron...

[00:14:03] I feel like... Uh... What... What's the... What's the next one on the list here? For ways to play? I feel like maybe you could... You could... Share a bit on that one. Oh yeah. The virtual console. Boy, there's uh... There's a lot of ways you could play that. Well... Used to be a lot of ways. Um... Now you're pretty much just limited to uh... Nintendo Switch Online. Switch Online. Before you could go on to the uh... Virtual console on...

[00:14:31] I forget when the one of the original Wii closed down. Uh... Wii U and 3DS that closed down just recently. And you could buy a lot. Like a lot of NES games on there. Of course. Like... The Excitebike. Super Mario. Fucking 1, 2, and 3. All the main series shit that you could think of. But they had a lot of hidden gems on there as well too. Um... Yeah. And you could kind of just buy them uh... Piecemeal. Individually. Like there was no... There was no subscription. Of course. The...

[00:14:59] The Wii U virtual console is gone. Yep. Um... Which... Again, I guess that's... That's the caveat of that kind of thing. Is the fact that like... You know, you... You could potentially invest in a platform and be like... Going all in on the virtual console on Wii U. There'll never be anything any better than this. And then Nintendo comes by and goes... Nah, we're shutting this shit down. Get... Get that idea. Yeah. I mean if... If you...

[00:15:27] If you already bought them and you have them downloaded though, you can still play them. It's just like... You just can't buy them now. You just can't get no more. And you could potentially... I mean if you have modded hardware, you could do a little virtual console injection and just pop them in there. But uh... Yeah, that's the other thing, right? Like... Which kind of leads into the emulation side of things. So... If you have... If you have a Wii U, for example.

[00:15:57] If you have that thing modded, then there are ways to, as Aaron said, inject these games. Safely, mind you. Safely inject. Not intravenously. You gotta go in the button. Don't share your ROM injections, please, folks out there. We should wash your hands before and after. Be safe with your ROM injections. Yes. But yeah, you can inject those in there and... Well I mean you can...

[00:16:26] There's plenty of things that you can... You can inject stuff that wasn't even on the virtual console. Yeah. If you own those cartridges, you can throw whatever you want on there. Really. It's not too, too hard. But um... And then yeah, the um... The emulation side. Again, I think you can talk to this because I feel like this is probably your main way to play NES these days. Hell yeah. There's... There's a bunch of ways you could do that.

[00:16:56] Like you could... Yeah. Model Wii U. Honestly, the Wii U is like a... It could play fucking like every Nintendo console other than Switch and like... Virtual Boy and all that stupid obscure shit. But um... Yeah. Pop it into the Wii U. Uh... If you have your 3DS modded, you can pop it into that too. It plays NES really well. Uh... This fucking Anbernic boy right here. Play some... There you go. Totally fine.

[00:17:26] I played quite a few NES games on there. I remember trying to play through uh... Uh... Gradius 1 or 2. I forget. And it got my ass handed to me. But it plays them perfectly. Beautifully. Uh... Make sure you uh... Make sure you get that run ahead on. I've never checked... Do you know what that is? I've never checked that out before. Is that what... You should check that out. What is it? Um... It's baked into RetroArc. Not all the cores support it. So you gotta make sure that you're running a core that supports the run ahead.

[00:17:53] And essentially what it does is it runs the emulation ahead by... You can select however many frames you want it. It's basically like... I... I'm not... I'm not an engineer or anything. And I don't... I don't know how to properly say these things sometimes. But like... Essentially what it's doing is it's like looking ahead. And it's eliminating input lag. And it feels way different to you. Okay. So like... That's the thing. If you're struggling with stuff like Gradius, um... Part of the reason which leads into uh...

[00:18:23] What I was gonna talk about with the FPGA side of things. Part of the reason why I ended up going the FPGA route with Mister... Is once I actually felt games like Mega Man and Shmups... Running on FPGA with like... Pretty much zero input lag. Like the way that it would feel the... On the actual console... Without input lag. Was like... I've been playing these games with lag for years. Because I did no different. And it's weird because like you... You get used to it in a weird way.

[00:18:53] But like... Stuff like... Gradius and Shmups that are like... Require that like... Pinpoint precision. Yeah. Like... You're gonna struggle no matter what. Um... But yeah, the uh... The FPGA side of things... Totally is... I've... I'm drinking the Kool-Aid by the jug at this point because... Your third eye is wide the fuck open now. Oh, I am TN with Chow Tzu. No Sensu beans.

[00:19:23] I am just... I am drinking it, man. I... Love the FPGA because of how accurate it gets the emulation side of stuff. Um... Again, it's emulation but it's not emulation. Um... And then... Yeah, that's... I mean... If I were to break this down, original hardware, again, I feel like at this point... Like... If you're a collector, that would be the route that you wanna go. I'm sure there's flashcards... Like, I know that there's flashcards that you can get.

[00:19:53] And again, if you can get a console that you know is well looked after and you have a way of... Testing everything, all the hard-granted components to make sure that they're good, then that's... That's a really cool option. Um... And then, you know, there's the virtual console and the emulation side of things, which our friend Aaron here uses. And then the FPGA side of things, which would be more the enthusiast lane of stuff. With the virtual console and the emulator side being the much more affordable side.

[00:20:23] And pretty much like the entry point where I would say like, hey, you know what? This is where you can start here. You can go over to our friend Vim's lair and grab yourself a couple ROMs and away you go. Check it out. Away you go. Um... But yeah, so that... That would... That kind of covers how you could go about playing these today. Um... Now... This is... This is the shit that I like.

[00:20:52] When you don't know something about a goddamn console that's been out for... Eons... It's crazy that like... I learned things while I was creating the notes for this and looking up stuff. I learned things that I didn't know about the NES. Which is crazy. It's crazy that I'm still learning things about retro stuff. And I love it. But, um... We're gonna hit you with some fun facts.

[00:21:21] You guys ready for some fun facts? Aaron, are you ready for some fun facts? I'm always ready. Hit me with it like a brick. Knock me out with those facts, boy. You spin me around, baby. The record round like a record. Bring out the olives! Oh! Bring out the olives! Bring out the olives! Time for the fun facts. Alright. What do we got? What do we got here? The original sapper looks like a fucking revolver. Holy shit.

[00:21:50] That's so true, dude. It did. Yeah. Yeah. So they, uh... They changed that completely when they brought it over here. Um... And we got that stupid orange looking thing. Actually, you know what? I take that back. I immediately take that back. The zapper? I don't know. Something about the zapper I like. I like the zapper. It's cool. It looks like a laser gun. Like, what's, uh... Yeah.

[00:22:18] Like, it's like how they depict the future in like 80s sci-fi movies. Yeah. How everything's like gray and white. That's... It looks like that. They were like, this is gonna be fucking guns in the year 2000, fucking 20. Like, guns in 2020 are just guns. Like... They're just revolvers. Yeah, dude. They had it right the first time. That revolver's fucking cool though, man. I'm looking at a, uh... A photo of the, uh...

[00:22:46] The Japanese NES zapper alongside... Oh, the fucking purple cart for, uh... For duck hunt. And the one with like the three dudes that you shoot. Oh my God. Those carts are awesome. Do you remember playing duck hunt back in the day? Oh, hell yeah. Fuck that dog though. So... We're... Yeah. You know what? I'll... I'm okay with the dog. What I don't like is my fucking friend walking up to the TV and holding the gun to the screen.

[00:23:17] That's cheating. Did you know anybody that... Yeah, did you... Like, this dumb kid did this all... Piece of shit. Piece of shit neighbor kid. He did this all the time. And I remember his dad... Like, and here's the thing. Like, I have like very fond memories. Uh, which we will get into. Of my friend across the street. He was the neighbor kid that I hung out with. And he had an NES. And he had the zapper.

[00:23:44] And I remember he would just be like mashing this thing against their floor model fucking wooden casket TV. And just riffing on the screen. And his dad would just be ripping cigarettes being like, you're gonna bust the TV. Like, he was like so pissed about him being so bad at video games. That's the coolest man in the universe right there. That sounds awesome. You're gonna break the TV brother.

[00:24:14] Brother. This choke slams that fucking kid into the next room. Ah! Uh, yeah. So, uh, he got in shit all the time for that. And I'm like, I'm like sitting back like an OG. Just like, what's up? What's up? Like just... Shooting the zapper. Fucking the ducks up. Hanging out with the dog. I don't know why everybody shits on the dog. Holy slut. Yeah, that... Look in the chat. That just...

[00:24:43] That just looks like a full-on gun. That's a gun. Hold on. I've got a better one for you. Hold on. First off, look at those beautiful cartridges in the chat. There's, um... It's Hogan's Alley. The fucking like sticker label thing on Duck Hunt looks so much better than the NES one. It's got like a little cartoon dog and stuff. And then also, uh, the other thing I just put in there, the, uh, the Famicom, Hyper Shot Light Gun. Feast your fucking eyes, dude. It's a little Uzi. I see it.

[00:25:13] It's a little fucking Uzi, bro. Oh my God. Look at this shit. No way. That's so dope. That's... We would never get stuff like that over here. That's the coolest shit I've ever seen. That's so cool. Oh, here's one, uh, in the box with the foam and all that shit. Man. Man, Japan really knows how to party. What game is this? Space? Is it space? Shadow, I think? Space Shadow in the box? Yeah, that's, that's cool shit. I love like packing stuff like that.

[00:25:42] Like when you would get like some sort of weird peripheral, but it would come with like a weird packing game. Yeah, dude. Um, and then yeah, so the Wii Zapper or the Wii Zapper. Oh my God. What am I talking about the Wii Zapper for? Oh yeah, the NES Zapper or whatever the fuck. Nintendo Zapper. Yeah. The, the Nintendo Zapper once was a fucking revolver. Um, and then we got, uh, this is, this is a fun one.

[00:26:11] And I, I did not know this until I started reading this stuff. The Nintendo seal of approval. You remember that, right? That gold sticker. A little gold like sun looking thing. Yeah. So games that weren't certified and approved for licensing by Nintendo were allowed to be on the NES, but they had to agree to either have the, the, the cartridges be black, blue or gold instead of the classic gray.

[00:26:40] And some examples of these cartridges would be Cheetah men too, which if there's any, uh, angry video game, uh, nerd fans out there, which I'm sure there probably is. If you're listening to a retro show, uh, he, I think he did. I think he did some videos on the Cheetah men games. Oh yeah, he did. They're bad. They're bad. Uh, and then there was chiller, uh, which it's like a, it's like a horror light gun game. Um, I think that was in a blue cartridge.

[00:27:11] And of course we can't, we can't be talking about unlicensed or, uh, yeah, unlicensed games unless we're talking about bubble bath babes, the indirect sequel to bubble bubble. I don't, I don't remember blue carts at all. Well, you probably didn't see them like the, like seeing an unlicensed game for you and I was very, like it would have been probably pretty rare. I don't think I ever knew a friend that had like an unlicensed game.

[00:27:41] I think, I think you would have to like go to like a dumpster behind like a dilapidated Denny's to find a blue cart NES game. Where else but Denny's? Cause like, yeah, that's, I mean, look at the chat. But I know, I know, I know. Those are beautiful. Look at those. Aaron, Aaron just posted the, uh, the carts for the Famicom versions of Mega Man one to five. One through six. Dude.

[00:28:10] Is it six? Oh yeah, yeah. Six. Um, dude. It's beautiful. They did a so fucking dirty over here with that shitty ass Mega Man art that we got with his backward hand and his real looking face and stuff. You don't remember that? Yeah, dude. With the, instead of having the Mega Buster attached to his arm, it was just him. Well, it's like a dude holding a gun. It's like, and he's holding it like this, but it's this hand in the other arm. Like, it's so dumb. These look so good. Like Mega Man. I know.

[00:28:40] They're so colorful. Light blue. The Mega Man two is red. Mega Man three is like, like a foresty green. Four is orange. You know what the really cool thing is too, for like collectors of this stuff? Famicom stuff is not expensive. Like I bet you, you could probably find this whole lot on eBay for like dirt cheap. I would get those frames, honestly. Like they're just so fucking pretty. That's what I mean. Like I would, I would love to just have them in like a case on display.

[00:29:06] Just, you know, or yeah, like you said, frame, frame it up, baby frame up. The second worst show on television. Yes. Um, but yeah, so, uh, the, um, the unlicensed games, very interesting that they had to be different colors over here. Again, uh, Japan had cool colors.

[00:29:34] Um, but I, even, even the colors that they made them have like the black, blue, gold. I feel like they purposely made them look like garbage. Ouch. Like they, they didn't, they didn't look good. A lot of Bible games. Ooh, a lot of Bible games. Yep. Yep. A lot of Bible games. A lot of Jesus. People seem to love this Jesus fella. Yeah. What's the deal with God?

[00:30:00] I don't know, but they're always trying to kill them in anime and fucking RPGs. Yeah, dude. You got, uh, you got a empty air in your pockets. Let me, let me see what you got in your pockets. You got any, you got any fun facts in there? Is it just balls of land? No, uh, actually there was a push to make the system seem more like an entertainment device and toy. Uh, which, yeah. Yeah. Which is why they made the Rob the robot. He would stack stuff. Yeah.

[00:30:26] So that's kind of, I think that's what I, what I was leading to earlier when we were talking about, uh, when they're doing like test markets, I feel like we may have even talked about it briefly on this show. Um, but I know that when Nintendo was starting to push to North America, they, they wanted to make sure that like, it's almost like they wanted kids to pick up on it and be like,

[00:30:55] that's a, that's a toy because as you know, at the time it was a video game crash. So video, video game systems weren't new and so hot over here. And they were like, well, if kids look at it as a toy and a, uh, like a form of entertainment, they're going to, they're going to want to buy it. So that's why like you had, had Rob robot, which was like, well, I mean, he was a toy, but he was like an interactive toy with your video game system.

[00:31:23] And quite honestly, it's pretty cool how they did that back in the day. Like just the interactivity of having Rob, like push the buttons and like it, it actually interacts with like a game. And I, I'm sure there's ROM hacks out there so that you can play the, um, the game that came with Rob. Um, like I think you can play two player where like one person acts as Rob. That may even be, you know, we could probably look it up, but that may even be an option if you're just playing like the regular cart.

[00:31:52] But the whole purpose of it was that Rob was supposed to do like the, the button pushes and shit like that. And then it's really cool. That is really cool. And then that's another thing too. Like the zapper, right? The, the whole thing with the zapper was like, it was, it was more of a toy kind of thing. It was, it appealed to, to young kids as, as like a, a toy. Hmm. Hmm. I wonder if anybody's beaten dark souls using Rob. Hmm. I don't know. Well, they beat it with bananas.

[00:32:21] So, I mean, you ever see that video? That's crazy shit, man. You, somebody beat dark souls for the banana. It's not just a banana, dude. Like multiple bananas hooked up to like wires that like, I think when the guy I squeezed them, they acted as like button inputs. Oh, the banana controller. What the fuck? How have you not seen this? I don't know, man. Banana controller.

[00:32:49] Looking at looking up with that controller even as whoa. What the fuck? Is it as I described? I think there's just, I'm getting. Many things. I don't know. Let's move on. One of them that popped up was the fucking, the prototype controller for like the PS3, the like fucking parenthesis. You look at piece of shit controller. The like, oh, the, the boomerang. Yeah, dude. Fuck that thing.

[00:33:20] Yeah. That's stupid. But hey, we're not here to, to reminisce about dumb concept peripherals for consoles that are way, way in the future from what we're talking about now. But one thing that I like to do with, with retro rehab is reminisce, you know, about the, the memories that we have with these consoles. I love reminiscing in rehab. Are you going to be all right?

[00:33:48] Yeah, no, my, I, I got so much grill smoke in my eyes today, man. My eyes are like on fire a little bit, but it's all good. I'll be all right. Because it's, it's kind of funny that like, as soon as I, you know, for the listeners, as soon as I start talking about memories, Aaron is just like holding his face and like rubbing his eyes. I'm like, all right, dude, I didn't know that you had like some heavy shit or anything with, with your, uh, your memories with the NES. No, my, that's when my parents got divorced is the day I played the NES for the first time.

[00:34:17] The one time I played, uh, I almost said Rockman Mega Man 2, my parents, my house exploded and my parents died. Oh my God. No, no, no, no. No, go ahead. Where was Mega Man Battle Network to fix explosions in your kitchen? I assume it was in the kitchen. All the, all, all explosions originate from the kitchen. That's.

[00:34:47] Uh. Fuck man. Reminisce. Let's reminisce. Yeah, let's reminisce. Let's reminisce. Aaron, uh, share some, share some nostalgia with me. Dude. Feed it into my veins. All right. Hook it up, baby. Um, I remember a lot of when my, when my mom first met my stepdad, uh, we would go visit in his, like in his dumpy trailer house. What? I'm sorry. I didn't, you said stepdad and I'm like, I'm here dunking on divorced fucking parents.

[00:35:16] And I didn't, I didn't, I didn't mean to take shots. Dude. I'm sorry. I didn't realize that that could have been a reality for you. No. It's real. Okay. Go on. All right. So, so stepdads, right? Um, fuck. So yeah. So we would go to his dumpy fucking trailer house, uh, every like other weekend or some ship.

[00:35:45] And my sister and I would play this NES he had, uh, for his, his other daughters. It's like, like his, I don't know his, his kids would play it too. Uh, we would play, um, oh fuck. I think it was like the Simpsons crusties playhouse or something like that. Oh yeah. And this one like, these are hard man. Like this seven up checkers game. I think it was just cool spot. Um, and cool spot.

[00:36:13] I forget which Mario game we played Mario as well too. Uh, so yeah, that was, that was a cool memory, I guess. It's a memory. It's a media memory. So, uh, spot dude, who the fuck buys seven up? Who goes to the store and is like, man, I sure am thirsty. Better get a fucking seven up. Stupid dude.

[00:36:44] Uh, well, I mean, I, I remember renting cool spot. So I'm guilty. Remember renting a seven up. I rent. Couldn't even, couldn't even afford a seven. I've had to rent them. Oh fuck man. Hit me with the pit bull, please. Mr. Where, where, Mr. 305. Today I just want to tell you. Can I meet me with that? I think. Thank you.

[00:37:07] Um, so most of my memories with the, the NES, uh, or then the NES. I know some people get, some people get wild about like how people call these, these consoles. Like some people call it the NES. Some people call it the NES. Or the NES. I mean, that one kind of irks me. Have you actually heard anybody call it that? Just on like videos. Like about like people on like YouTube saying NES. And that kind of irks me a little bit, but like. I don't like that one. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:37:37] It's kind of Z there. Kind of makes your skin crawl like that slug man from our licensed games episode. I forget his name, but. Oh my God. Oh my God. Deep cut. Mm-hmm. Just like 7up. Yep. Just like 7up. Uh, most of my memories with the NES smell like smoke. Nice. Mine too, man.

[00:38:05] Cause like it, it was always at my neighbor friend's house and they smoked inside. Like a lot. And it was just like, I just remember sitting on their brown carpet that smelled like cigarettes that had cigarette ashes in it. And they had that, they had that fucking, I'm going to take you back. You ready for this? They had that floral pattern, like yellowy brown couch with like the brown floral patterns on it.

[00:38:34] That was like kind of soft. Actually the one from, the one from Roseanne. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Let me see if I can find it. Roseanne couch. Yeah. Google Roseanne couch. Is it that exact couch? Okay. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. I'm fairly certain. Dude. I look at that couch and I can taste cigarettes. Like I, I like it just every couch I've ever seen like that smelt like cigarettes or,

[00:39:03] or sometimes old people. Yep. That's no, and if you're lucky, no, if you're lucky, you know, both. That's the, that's the, that's the classic. That's the, that's the smoky old people. The double whammy. Smoky old people. Throw a smoky old person on the Barbie. Um, Oh, my God. I about to go smoke me.

[00:39:33] Oh, person. Oh, fuck. I can't, I can't do a good Australian accent right now. Too fucked up. Oh, fuck. Uh, but yeah. So anyways, cigarette smoke, couches, floor, um, and of course floor model TV with the Nintendo on the top of it. Oh my God. And yes. Yeah. And I, you know, I remember obviously playing super Mario brothers and I remember quickly like, I, I just, I don't have a vivid room.

[00:40:02] Like, like I don't have a memory that's super visit vivid about Mario brothers. However, I, I just remember almost immediately being like, I, I need to have this in my house. I need to be able to do this all the time because this is the best thing I I've ever seen. And I remember I quickly picked up on it because my friend who was, I think he was like a year

[00:40:28] younger or two than me and he would just run straight into the Goomba die and just get the biggest kick out of it. And he thought like, that was it. That was the game. And I was like, are you stupid? It's like smoke, dude. Dumb. His brain cells are fucking dead from all the smoke. You dumb, dumb five year old. So like, I would, I would, I would just like take the controller and I'd start playing.

[00:40:57] And I was like, there's these other buttons. What do they do? And yeah, I picked up on it quick and then quickly graduated to playing of all things like this. Okay. So this kid had like the classes. He had super Mario brothers slash dog hunt. He had, he had Zelda. He had Mario three at some point, I think her. Yeah. He had Mario three.

[00:41:25] And then he had by you, Billy. Hell yeah, dude. That name is shit. By you, Billy. It's a, it's a beat them up from Konami and it is tough as nails. And I just remember thinking that game is for the adults because for the, we can't build the, for the adults because we can't do anything in this game. And I've, I've thrown that on like semi recently.

[00:41:53] Still, still pretty goddamn hard. Um, and then he also had a boy in his blob, which was really, hell yeah. You ever play that? I, I've never played the NES or like, like the original version. Probably, probably the Wii one. Yeah. I played a little bit of the remake. The, that also came to, uh, Xbox one, I believe. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I forgot that they re-released that. Um, that, that remake's not that bad actually.

[00:42:22] Cause it is like a pretty brand spanking new game has a really cool art style, but the original, um, for its time was really neat. And I, I always, I, this is kind of funny. I thought the blob was like chasing me the whole time. So I was just like screaming, being like this fucking blob, this blob. Cause like, he's always just bouncing right behind you. And I was like, just filled, just drenched in anxiety as a child. God.

[00:42:51] Like, I wish I could bottle up that anxiety and just hold it forever. Mom. In a jar. Mom. Cause it was. The blob is coming. The blob. Mom, please. The, and like, there's something terrifying about it because he's always smiling. He had that dumb face. He was kind of like, if I remember correctly, he was just kind of like, like two thirds of a snowman. That's kind of like what he looked like. And yeah, he would just bounce around behind you. And then eventually I realized like, oh, he's not trying to kill me.

[00:43:21] Cause my only, my only experience with anything else on a screen other than the thing that I'm controlling up to that point was everything's trying to kill me. And then I realized you could take the beans and stuff and like give them different things, turn them into a ladder. Man, you can turn that guy. You can turn that blob into whatever you wanted, man. Yeah. Different flavor. Jelly beans determine different things like, uh, uh, fuck peppermint. I don't remember what any of them did, but they were cool, different flavors that turned them into cool, different things.

[00:43:52] Yeah, man. I'm sure. Sure. My, uh, my buddy's dad was definitely ripping on a cigarette. He's like, wish it would fix my marriage. His mom off somewhere in Florida, chain smoking. She was like, oh my God, he's probably playing fucking blob game again. Oh my God. Either that or buy you, buy you Billy. I left my husband cause he wouldn't stop playing buy you Billy.

[00:44:19] Rutherford, stop playing that blob game where you're feeding the beans. Rutherford? Who the fuck is Rutherford? That's your friend. I don't know. Couldn't be further. His dad's name was Danny. Danny. Whatever dude. Are we? Fucking Danny just fucking chain smoking and wishing a boy and his blob would fix his marriage. Fuck. Oh man. That hurts. You got any more, you got any more mammaries or?

[00:44:49] I've got plenty of mammaries. What am I, what are my favorite memories? Like in an, in an ironic way, one of my favorite memories is when you go to put a game in, you push it down, flip the cover down, push the power button and it doesn't fucking work. So you got to like repeat that 80 times until it finally does work. That's cool. I'm going to take the cartridge and fucking blow into it. Like you're playing a goddamn pan flute.

[00:45:22] And then you open a fucking gateway to the next dimension. Fucking gold man comes out. And he was like, he also has the smoker mom voice. I see you're wanting to play the boy in the block. I don't fucking know. I don't know. I bought a lot of, I bought a lot of mammaries, dude. You got a lot of mammaries. The sweet vivid mammaries. Yeah. I do.

[00:45:52] Are we going to talk about any hidden gems or is that a totally different topic? No. Like if you got some, if you got some hidden gems lurking around your house, some hidden brother ferns. Bring up the olives. Woo. Holy shit.

[00:46:14] So if you like pinball, pinball quest is a, it's a pinball RPG. It's fucking really insane and cool. Well, not insane. It's just, it's a pinball game. That's an RPG. That's really cool. Uh, Solomon's key. If you like puzzle games, it's hard. It plays the same fucking music track all the time, but it's fun. And a wampum wampum school.

[00:46:44] It's like a native American mega man. Really? Yeah. Yep. Oh man. Give me all those mega man recommendations. Dude, I'm all about it. It's cool. Like it's actually, I was going to say that. I do have some pretty vivid memories of visiting. I had some cousins that lived like maybe like a half an hour away that were kind of like out in the, in the country a little bit.

[00:47:12] And they had an NES and they had like, it's funny because like my friend across the street had like a certain set of games, you know? And then when I went over to my cousin's house, it was a totally different set of games, like way different. And it was kind of cool to think back then, like you're seeing like two different tastes in video games.

[00:47:36] Like, you know, my, my friend across the street had like the standard super Mario and he had Zelda, but my cousin had mega man one and two. And I thought that shit was off the hook, man. That shit is so much. I played so much. Maga man plays so much. Maga man. And I just remember going in there and he'd be like, cause he, he was like older. He was probably like 10 years older than me. And he'd just be like, you want to play some Maga man? And he just like sit me down and flick on the TV.

[00:48:06] And I just remember playing the shit out of Maga man. Didn't know, didn't know what I was doing. I don't think I ever beat a, a robot master or anything, but like I played it, played it, played it and played it. And then I also remember playing a Ninja Turtles there as well. Oh yeah. And I didn't know how to do it. Didn't know how to do anything in that game either. We had drove, drove around. I think Shredder's revenge. Was that on NES or was that SNES? Shredders? No, no.

[00:48:37] We had one for the, I think we have one for the NES or was the, I'm all messed up because I just discovered that, that this very day, May 8th is not only my birthday, but it's also World Donkey Day. What? Yeah, dude. Today's World Donkey Day. So that's, that's cool, I guess. Thanks mom. Yeah, dude. Year of the donkey. Cool. Yep.

[00:49:07] May 8th, World Donkey Day. Happy birthday, Aaron. Christ almighty. Did you, did you ever play any Donkey Kong on NES? Uh, I think so. I'm fairly certain. Yeah. It's funny because I think I remember my mom, like when I was, when I started asking

[00:49:34] for a Nintendo, she was like, you know, saying to my dad, she's like, Oh, if we get that we can get Donkey Kong. Cause like, she used to love playing like Donkey Kong in the arcade and stuff. And there was no Donkey Kong in our house other than country when that came out on Super Nintendo. God damn it mom. Um, yeah. Oh, and I also have, now that I'm, I'm talking about this stuff, I just, I just remembered I have a memory of playing, uh, Bubble Bobble. No, not Bubble Bobble.

[00:50:03] Balloon, Balloon Pop. Oh, Balloon Fight? Yeah, Balloon Fight. Yeah. That was some good shit. That's good. That's still fun to just like throw on, to just like do a run, you know? I, um, yeah. Like what the fuck is the game? Uh, just had it in the back of my mind. Uh, uh, Excitebike. My, uh, my cousins and I used to play that every so often.

[00:50:30] And we would just see like who could, who could, uh, wipe out the fastest. Cause you have all the different lanes and like some, some have mud before others. I don't know. We would just see who would wipe out first before everybody else. And that was, that was the thing. Whoever wiped out first wins. I don't know. That was cool. Nice. Do you remember any of the weird peripherals? Like the, the power glove? Oh, the power glove is awesome. Do you remember the, do you remember the power glove? It was so useless though.

[00:50:58] Like it, it was like, why? Like you could hold a controller comfortably in your hand or you can wrap your arm around your own head and basically like, like it was so dumb. Like, I don't even know if, if it did anything special, maybe like, could you like squeeze your hands or something like to do different stuff? I don't, I barely remember. I, I've seen that thing in person though.

[00:51:24] I had a friend who I, I don't, I don't remember who it was, but he, I know there was one friend that had that and they had like, they had this big fucking mat with like, so dumb dude. Like basically like a DDR mat back in the day of the NES. The only thing was, it was just like the D pad input and like the buttons and you would have to like step on it and like, God, that sounds terrible.

[00:51:53] Like you would, you would lay this thing down on like shag carpet crusted and fucking cigarettes and you'd just be trying to step on the things. But like the shag carpet was so thick that it would just like sink in and like it wouldn't even read the button input. It was so dumb. Chain smoking. Mom is coughing up a big lung cookie in the back while you're trapped in a play. Donkey Kong. Dude. The NES had a pretty cool fight stick though.

[00:52:18] Um, which I, it's kind of weird considering the, the NES kind of, kind of couldn't run fighting games all that well, but I mean, I guess it doesn't, it doesn't matter about fighting games cause it had like arcade ports, uh, but like, yeah, Donkey Kong and, um, uh, Hogan's Alley and stuff like that. I guess Hogan's Alley was a like game or no, I think you could play it with the controller. Okay. Can you? Oh yeah, probably. Um, yeah.

[00:52:48] Is there any, is there any, any NES games that you haven't played that are like kind of like known and well known to like, to be good games that you haven't played that you're kind of like, one of these days. I don't know, man. I think I've pretty much tried all the ones I've wanted to try. Maybe. I've never tried DuckTales. Maybe Metal Gear. Oh yeah. I've never tried that. That's actually, I've thrown that on.

[00:53:17] It's, it's actually pretty fun. It's different. That would be. It's not, it's not quite what you, like it is what you think it is, but it's, it's, it's a little different. It's, it's neat. That's cool shit. Um, yeah. But, um, DuckTales. I've never played DuckTales. And I know like Shovel Knight is like, based on DuckTales, like the, the mechanic of like jumping and then like aiming your weapon down and bouncing off stuff. But I've, I've never played it.

[00:53:45] And it's a, I'm pretty sure it's a Capcom game, which I mean, you know, in the 8-bit and 16, it's gotta be good. It's good. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's what I was saying. Capcom in the 8-bit and 16-bit era were just kings. Like they, they were just putting out fire left, right and center. It was crazy. I'm a, but yeah. Download it right now. Do it. Tell them to do it. We should, uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's, let's do it.

[00:54:15] Um, oh, you know what else? I, I actually have pretty fond memories of playing Super Mario Brothers 2. Um, at the, the cousin's house that had the Mega Man games. Again, kind of funny. He didn't, I don't think, I don't remember playing Super Mario Brothers there or Super Mario 3. That was the only place that I went that somebody had Super Mario 2. And I, I remember back then being like, this is stupid. What is this game?

[00:54:44] Like, this is, I hate this. When is turn up Super 4, man? Yeah. And like, why is the sun chasing me all the time? This is ridiculous. Um, but I feel like I have, I have a special place. I feel like I have a special place in my heart for that game now. Especially the fact that like, that is the game that introduced like, Shy Guys. Uh, it, it introduced Birdo. Like there's, there's some like iconic. Oh yeah.

[00:55:12] Nintendo characters that were introduced in that game. Um, kind of wild though that, uh, spoiler alert. The game is all a mark. Like one of Mario's dreams. Is it? Oh, that's how it ends. Yeah. You, you kill the frog dude. Uh, shit. What was his name? You murdered him in cold blood. Yeah, man. Just fuck that frog up. Um, but yeah, like after you beat him, it's just like a dream.

[00:55:40] That was also not what the, so the original Mario two in Japan was not that game. Cause that game was based on, uh, what was it called? Like, uh, I don't, I don't remember. Doki Doki Panic. I think maybe. Yeah. Doki Doki Panic. That's what it was.

[00:56:04] Um, and I mean, you look at Doki Doki Panic and you're like, oh, this is this, this is the same game. It's just that they swapped out the main characters. What the fuck? Did you not know this? No, I didn't know this at all. Fun facts. Bring out the olives. Holy shit. Yeah, man. This is what I'm saying. Like it's the same game. Uh, but I guess because the original Mario two in Japan,

[00:56:34] Japan was so goddamn hard. They were like, there's no way that we're going to bring this over to the U S it's too, it's too hard. We don't think that it's going to be for that audience. So they're like, well, we gotta have something. We gotta have a Mario two. And then they just swapped out the characters and did some, some fine tuning. And they released Mario two as this over here. So yeah, Doki Doki Panic is the original. Actually, I should play that.

[00:57:02] I should play that sometime just to, just to say I played it. Fuck. Yeah. But yeah, same, same characters, man. Like it's, it's, it's wild. The more, you know, um, the more, you know, um, I was, I was saying something I was remembering. Oh yeah. So yeah. The Mario two, Mario two. Um, and then Mario three, dude, Mario three was a game changer.

[00:57:27] And the one thing that stands out to me of all the things with my first time with Mario three is the fact that there's some, the music's fantastic. Not the first thing that stands out. The first thing that stands out, this is so stupid. You wouldn't even, you're not even going to like, this is, this sounds like clickbait. It's not, you're not even going to believe how stupid this is. You won't believe your eyes. How stupid this is.

[00:57:58] There's a few points in the game. When you go down through a warp pipe into like an underground part and there's just like coins or whatever down there. And then you just go up through like the other side to the, in another pipe. Sometimes that area is like copied and pasted. And it looks like a diaper. What the fuck? That's cool. I don't know if I don't know. Is it? I don't know. I don't know if that's cool. That that's what my, my brain remembers the most.

[00:58:28] Like looking back on my childhood and be like, yeah, Mario three, those diaper segments. And like, I would just go down underneath and you know, you get that swank ass music down there. Swank ass. Yeah. Down there in the, the diaper zone. But no, of course I also remember like the, the raccoon tail was so cool.

[00:58:53] The fact that there was like a world map and stuff that was wild back, back then that you could like pick levels and stuff and go like different routes. And yeah, you know, you get to like, you get to the castle and be like, man, where's the castle? Like this game is almost done. And then you, you beat it and be like, well, I guess we're not done. I guess we got to keep going. Cause you get to like the big castle and go up in the goddamn sky in a fucking airship. And then that ominous ass music, dude, that music was terrifying as a kid. Yeah. Do you remember that? Yeah.

[00:59:23] It was just like, there's bullets flying fucking everywhere at you. Yeah, dude. And man, the last world in Mario three is basically just hell. Like you go to hell to kill Bowser. Like it's just like in this crazy lava world and it's, oh my God. That was, that was nuts. I love it. Oh, Mario three is a masterpiece. Yeah. It's a masterpiece. Masterpiece theater. Yes.

[00:59:52] Um, what else? Anything else? Any more tapped? Yeah. No more tapped out from mammaries. My mammaries are tapped, bro. I've been milked dry. It's so stupid, but I'm not, not going to laugh at it. Uh, all right.

[01:00:19] Well, why don't we, uh, why don't we take a commercial break here from our sponsors and we'll be back with the, uh, the closing random recommended games and, uh, the outros. Hey Jerry. Yeah, man. Are you tired of having to me? Are you tired of having to Google map everything like to go anywhere when you, when you want to find directions? Are you tired of having to pull out your fucking smartphone to do anything on there?

[01:00:49] Wouldn't that suck? I do. I, I, most times it's a, uh, Lenovo think pad that's hot wired to my, um, my car and then using a wifi signal from my phone, uh, which I then bring up asked Jeeves. And then I ask him how to get to my destination, which it's, it's kind of a hindrance. What if I were to tell you, you could instead bust out the manual from an old NES game called

[01:01:16] Legend of Zelda and draw a map right in there in the manual. The blank pages on the back. You could draw a map there or the one from Metro, I draw a map there, plot your course from where you start in the world, wherever you are to wherever you end up. And, uh, soon you'll have a fully fleshed out map of your daily routines. So you don't get lost. I mean, you already knew where to go and how to get there, but like, at least now you have a detailed map in case the internet crashes. Yeah.

[01:01:46] People will flock to you. They'll pay you money for your hand drawn maps. Like you're some kind of topographer. That's a term for someone who makes maps, by the way, topographer, the art of topography. That's a lost art, but not anymore. Not anymore. Cause you yourself will be able to enroll in topography school with pro code retro rehab, Aaron's

[01:02:13] topography school mastery.net forward slash combustible iron pegs, iron pegs. Oh, fuck. Uh, no, that wasn't the right address. Ah, whatever. Use, use the promo code wherever you want. You, you look, you can go to manscape. You could use the promo code there. It doesn't matter. The promo code works everywhere. It's universal.

[01:02:40] Um, but if you want to enroll, enroll today, become a professional topographer, bust out that Zelda map. Um, don't worry though. If none of the landmarks look like you're in the right spot, just pretend they are. Just pretend they are. You know, you get to Mount Doom, but you're just actually at a Wendy's. That's now Mount Doom. Yeah. Simple as that. Yeah, exactly. We're not going to tell you how to run your life. You're the topographer. Now you can also call 1-800-555-5555.

[01:03:10] And they'll give you a little, they'll give you a little hint. Be like, where do I go from here? Where the fuck am I supposed to go? And, cause just like the old NES hit lines, you call them and get a hint on where you're supposed to go in the game. They'll be like, they'll be like, okay, where do you want to go? And you'll say, man, I don't know. I just want to fucking sandwich from the bodega. I just want to die. I just want to die. I just want to sandwich from the bodega down the street. They'll be like, okay, head down the street. That'll be $2 please.

[01:03:38] And then you'll be, all right, cool. Down the street I go for a fucking chopped cheese or something stupid. Hell yeah. You'll, you'll, you'll be at your destination in no time with retro rehabs, very own topography glasses and, and hit line. And yes. And don't worry if you don't have a Zelda map handy. We got you covered.

[01:04:04] You just bust out that original artwork from Mega Man one, and you just trace his face, his real face. You just trace that out in the direction that you want to go. Simple as that. It works. You're going to be where you want to be. Yeah. It works every single time. You want to, you want to find the closest bed, bath and beyond? Just get out that original artwork from bubble bath babes. It'll get you there. It's got to make sure you point it in the direction of the sun. Point it, like point it up at the sun and then trace it. Otherwise it won't work.

[01:04:34] If you act now, we'll even throw in with, with the promo. Don't forget the promo code. Do not forget the promo code. The promo code is very important. We do not get paid without the promo code. Aaron, tell them the promo code again. Promo code is retro rehab is really fucking cool. And I love it. For slash, or sorry. Dot org for slash combustible pegs.

[01:05:01] But what we'll throw in is a patent compass. And it's, it's one that is just, all it is, is an ashtray. Okay. It's just an ashtray. That's all it is. It's an ashtray, but it's got a compass in the middle of it. There's only about three of them in the world. And we promise that we'll ship them to you immediately. And it'll only cost you like another, maybe 1750.

[01:05:30] Please don't put out cigarettes on it because it will melt. And then you won't have a compass. And then you're fucked. Then you're totally fucked. If you ruin the compass and the Zelda map and the mega man face and the bubble bath babes, original artwork, you are fucked. So you better hope that topography class really does you well. You better call now. You know, you better call that. Kyle, call 911.

[01:05:58] Which you should do because you're fucked. Thanks for sponsoring this episode. Random recommendations. Yeah, baby. I love this part. You know, it's sad. This is the part where we get ready to say goodbye for now.

[01:06:27] But at the same time, we get to give you a... I kind of want to just get like a sound bite of me and be like, random recommended games. And then just like have it like games, games, games, games. Dude, do it. And like have it sound like I'm in like a fucking cavern. I could probably do it just with that thing that I just did. You totally could. And then after that, I'll be singing the blues clues ending song thing. That's the perfect show. The show has no flaws.

[01:06:57] The greatest collaboration of all time. But yeah, it's bittersweet. You know, here we are saying goodbye. But we always leave you with a little something. You know, we always leave you with a little something. A little something, something. Here's a little something. Yeah, a little something. Yeah. Hit me with a little something, something, Aaron. Okay. Hey, Saturn Bomberman. I don't know what the fuck I was doing with the hand thing. Saturn Bomberman is cool.

[01:07:27] Back in the day, you could play with up to like, I think 12 people or something with a multi-tap. I think that's... Seriously? I think that's how much of what... It was some absurd amount. But even if you don't have that many friends to play with, or a fucking Sega Saturn or a copy of the game, which is expensive as shit to begin with. You could emulate it. Or FPGA it, I guess. Sure can. And the story mode is pretty cool. Pretty fun. It's probably the best Bomberman games. The story mode is amazing. Yeah.

[01:07:56] I would also die on that hill, if I'm being honest. Because I actually recently beat that game. Actually, I think I sent you a picture when I was playing that and you were like, holy shit, is that Saturn Bomberman? Yeah. That is a fantastic co-op game. It's so good. The level design is so, so fun. And the music is really fucking good, too. Yeah. It's... Everything about it, man.

[01:08:26] That game is just... That's a... That's a five out of five for me, right there. Here at X-Play, we give it a five out of five. I'm an obsessed player. Ten turnips out of five onions. Ooh. And my random recommended game is Little Samson.

[01:08:53] Talking about expensive-ass games, this might be the most expensive game that you could buy on the NES. If I... I'm... You know... I could be stood corrected, but... Hey, Aaron! Yes. Would you like to play... How much does it cost? Let's go. I need to know how much this costs. All right. Here we go. This is our second edition of How Much Does It Cost.

[01:09:22] I'm gonna head over to, uh... Price Charting. And we're gonna look up... Aaron, what is your bet for how much Little Samson is? 300... No. Complete... Complete in box... 1,000 dollars. 1,000 dollars. Complete in box? Yeah. Complete in box, 1,000 dollars. Yes. Okay. Are you ready? Yes.

[01:09:52] 4,600 dollars! 4,600 dollars! That's fucking crazy, dude. If you're just, you know, looking to play the game, though. If you just wanna get the cart alone, it's 1,800 dollars! Ugh. For the cart. That's... That's painful. That's just painful. Isn't that wild? Ugh.

[01:10:21] Thanks for playing. How much does it cost? Gosh. I can't believe... That's... I know, it's... It's wild. So I played this probably in the last couple years. And I had always heard about how good this game was and how much of a shame it is that it is super rare and extremely hard to get your hands on. Um... Cause this game is really good, man. It's kinda got like a Mega Man-ish feel to it. You end up getting like these powers where like you can transform into different like monsters

[01:10:50] and they have like different abilities and stuff. And the level design is really fun. It's not an extremely long game, but like it's just... It's so good, man. It's so, so good. So... I highly recommend that if... You know... Play it however you can get your hands on it. Um... And try this... Try this game out because it's... It's a really, really good game on the NES. And... Even though like it's kinda one of those... Uh...

[01:11:20] Hidden gems that is brought up a lot. So like... It kinda loses its luster a bit from being an actual hidden gem because it gets talked about so much. Yeah. But I'm sure there's probably people out there that have never heard about it. Um... But I... Yeah. Definitely, definitely play this game. It's... It's a lot of fun. Especially if you... If you're into, you know, NES platformers and... Like Mega Man type games and stuff like that. It is on my list. Yep. Get it on. Get it on.

[01:11:52] As Captain Tenille would say, get it on! Let's get it on. Yeah. Let's get eliminated. Uh... Please eliminate me. Thank you all so much for listening and getting some rehab in with us today. In the meantime, Jerry's gotta organize his expired punch cards contained in his Velcro wallet.

[01:12:16] And Aaron's going to challenge Rob the robot to work in an Amazon warehouse for the day. That's the perfect job for Rob, man. That is the perfect job for Rob. Um... We'll start a GoFundMe page for Rob the robot so that he can get, you know, get back on his feet. Get a real job so he can quit the Amazon warehouse. I'm sure there's more advanced robots working in that warehouse. Rob is how old now? Pretty old. He's older than me. He's gotta quit chain-smoking first. He's gotta...

[01:12:46] He's gotta start chewing that gum that's, uh, Nicorette. That's Zonic. You're just slapping pieces of chewed Nicorette gum on Rob's face. Chew up, Rob! Munch, munch, munch. Yup. But until next time, again, you can get us on Twitter at RetroRehabPod. We're also on Instagram at RetroRehabPod. And we are on YouTube at RetroRehab. And... Yeah.

[01:13:16] Please, by all means, smash that like button, baby. Uh... no, I'm kidding. I hate, I hate when people say that shit. Uh... but... All jokes aside, please, you know, if you like an episode, rate us and, uh, subscribe to the show. It helps out. And, uh, you know, check out our other podcasts. The sister podcast of this, this podcast are Super Ghost Radio and Super Pod Saga. Um, and then we will see you on the next one. Yeah. Bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.